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You've already learned how to weed through women’s profiles, but after reading that article, it became clear to me that men need to understand how to make their own profile stand out from the crowd. As a woman who dated online for years and now has her own business in the field,A Little Nudge, I know what other women want. I’ll break it into three categories: photos, profiles and emails.
PhotosNo. 1: The number of photos
Match.com lets you put a whopping 26 pictures in your profile. The key here is that just because they allow for that many doesn’t mean you need to use all the space. This is online dating, not a Facebook album, so three to six pictures is plenty.
Just as a woman is only as attractive as her worst picture (being a woman, the same may be true for men). Put your best pictures out there — as long as they are accurate. Two great photos win over four or more mediocre photos any day. Women will look for the one bad one and decide not to email you because of it.
No. 2: What to put in the pictures
I see so many pictures of men with their buddies. Why? You are already being compared to all of the other profiles on whatever dating site you’re using, so why let someone compare you in your very own profile picture? Have you ever looked at a girl’s profile and thought to yourself, “Well, she’s cute, but her friend in the pic is cuter. Man, I wish I could meet her instead.” Women do that too. So, start cropping! Also, pictures of scenery to show your “lifestyle” or last vacation should be saved for facebook. We want to see you — period.
No. 3: Accuracy
Getting in front of someone after you’ve posted inaccurate pictures won’t win her over; it will drive her away.
No. 4: The “interesting” pictures
The last picture you post should be your “interesting” picture. This is my secret. Now that we think you’re good-looking, we need something to help us start a conversation. Posting a picture of you skydiving, being a volunteer firefighter, posing with your dog — these are what make you different and give us something to ask about if we email you.
Profile RulesNo. 1: Set Yourself Apart
I’m sure we’ve all seen the “I love music and traveling, and I love to laugh” profiles. Most people I know enjoy those things. But I don’t know a lot of people who have lived in eight states in the U.S., enjoy taking improv comedy classes and took three weeks off from work once to see if he found his calling in bird-watching. (The answer was no.)
These are the things we want to know — the things that make you quirky and unique.
What we don’t want to see is: “I like to work hard and I like to play hard.” Does anyone really know what this means? Does this tell us anything about who you really are?
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